Forget Facebook, iTunes needs the help—five reasons iTunes is killing me.

Maybe they’re too focused on the iPhone, but iTunes needs a real update that covers both form and function. Amazing that with all the developments and updates iGod does with the OS and hardware as well as favorite toys iPod and iPhone, the iTunes interface has essentially remained the same for years. (They’ve obviously focused on refining the shopping process for the Apple Store though. Wouldn’t wanna blow that. *snark cranked to 11*)

Apple purists/snobs/whatever will say you don’t need to fix what ain’t broke because, well, it’s as refined as it can be. I’m one of those purists/snobs and I’m saying hold up—in this case, that’s just not true anymore because I think they got complacent. It’s apparent when you go through any of the tutorials at Apple.com that they think they’ve just nailed the perfect music organization experience. Maybe, but iTunes feels sterile, and music is anything but.

Simple is one thing, outdated is another. Here are five things in no order that bug me the most about iTunes:

1) No integration with outside streaming music sites. iLike, Blip, Last and the rest may model their communities around the idea of the iTunes playlist, and each may be pushing for iPhone compatibility, but there’s currently no way to link all the sites a person listens to with iTunes. I also love a lot of what I find in their streaming radio section, but that experience is buried. I’d love to see it played up more at launch and in the iTunes store. Even the online streaming stations like radioparadise.com. Worse, most of these sites all drive traffic back to iTunes to purchase and they don}t seem to be getting the same love back.

Apple is showing the same hubris stubborness that record labels were when it came to downloadable music. Does Apple really believe people only use one service to get their music now? People are faithful to one thing: Their favorite music, not just the site it’s on, and they’ll go wherever they can to find it.

2) Outdated functions. First, off, iTunes loads way too slowly, either when it first launches or switching between things like the music library and the iTunes store. Second, if you have a ton of stuff in your library, you know what a chore it is to have to scroll for miles to get through all the playlists. Shouldn’t be this way. Add an alphabetical nav to get around faster. Last is the search feature. Weak. Doesn't find simple things like the playlists I create. If the Mac’s Finder can do a global search, so should iTunes.

3) Adding/deleting/synching iPod songs is painful. IRS forms are easier to figure out. You have to be careful NOT to erase the music you already have on your iPod when you go to synch it up. Want to update a podcast from the library directly? Not so fast stud. Being able to drag and drop something directly where you want is the hallmark of the Mac OS, but not when you go to synch-up existing podcast subscriptions1 .

4) Dead. Gray. Interface. All white is all right as far as Apple goes, but Microsoft battleship cubicle gray has got ta go. How about an option to skin the interface any way you want? Almost any social net now has even basic features that surpass iTunes in terms of customability—new word, Wiki that shit younginz—but you can’t even change the background color in it. I take that back. They have a small window to display iPod artwork in the lower left and the Visualizer. *yawn* (You may not prefer iLike, but at least its look is a lot more colorful and interesting.)

5) The iTunes store. Talk about an interface that needs work. Feels like the crowded window of a Barnes & Noble with 500 different new releases that they want you to buy. There’s nothing special that sticks out in all the steel gray blueness. (Again, regarding No. 4 above, Apple.com with its open whiteness is much cleaner by comparison.) As for their reviews, I don’t like the idea of being given a set list of Top things to check out based on, well, they don’t say. Which leads me to...

**BONUS RANT**

6) No iTunes community. It’s astonishing that a brand like Apple that revolutionized how individuals experience music, has done nothing to foster a broader sense of community in support of the music itself. Instead, they’ve let third-party streaming sites pop up and do it for them. The only “community” there is deals with complaints or troubleshooting, and it’s on Apple.com.

If they can set one up there, why not build a music-only blog or forum in the application as well as in the store. I'm not saying site function needs to be as complicated as Last.fm, but you don’t build a music community based on discussing software releases or newbs asking FAQ about how to burn a CD—you do it by talking about the music.

Got an iTunes peeve? Lemmee hear it.

Tags: Apple, iTunes

Contextual sadness?

Or just really good placement this time.

“If applying for federal suicide prevention assistance due to current economic conditions, please use form 10-FUE.”

So the government announced a new site in case you feel really awful about the economy and plan to take your family out. (Don’t. They’re still valuable as deductions.) Although it’s going to be really hard to think that the feds will be able to move swiftly enough to help anyone depressed. Last place I go for reassurance when I’m down is a government website. (DMV’s what got me bummed in the first place.)

Overheard internet.

Because the internet is cool, honest and sad:
___________________

“It almost looks like that letter is dated 2001, in which case this girl would be way too old by now to "work" for Uncle Dov.” – Mount_Prion
___________________

“remember when muse first started to attract attention how they where slanderd as a radiohead covers band?” – xvaughanx
___________________

“Piano and words. Oh I can do anything!!!” – ChicagoScooterClub
___________________

“u realise i said jk (joking) retard read before u leave retarded comments” – sk8terbate32
___________________

“This is why I prefer to just be a shitty failure of a human being privately, or, on the Internet, anonymously.” – Sproing

Hey stud, she wants both of you.

When the gray comes out, the glasses come off.

Tags: Just For Men Touch of Gray

“We open wide, then zoom in on the casket.”

(To save even more on production, we can use the embalming cart as a dolly.) Then we cut to girlfriends, focusing not on a life well-lived, but on the quality services offered.

Stay away from Canada. It’s just not safe there.

Yeah, so, remember that whole not-too-shocking dating PSA? This pretty much makes up for it.

Yeah, I’m mad.

This makes me want to do something alright, like punch a wall. While I understand the nature of what it is they’re going for regarding dating violence, I absolutely hate the execution of this DoSomething.org PSA. Re-enacting crimes using actual police reports isn’t new. Many reality shows about police have already done it, and I like the trick here for a PSA. Problem is, the student-like voiceover is too annoying and read way too quickly, coupled with a shooting style that feels like a bad History Channel recreation. Not to mention tipping their hand with a warning of what was to follow and diminishing the brutality. Solid idea that could’ve been so much more effective if handled differently.

Loser-generated Amish legless hookers.

This week’s Beancast covers my favorite topics above along with fired CEOs, and is joined by John Wall and Angela Natividad. Download the show directly here. Topics here. (Subscribe through iTunes here.) You can also follow us on Twitter: TheBeanCast, mtlb, John and Angela.

Now that it’s been 427 episodes with me on, I wanted to give a shout out and thank Mr. Knorpp for having me as a guest so frequently, and also to give a little background on the show. I’m not a marketing or PR guy in the tradition of others, even though I cover a lot of those topics on the podcast and at times here on the blog. I’m an art director interested in every area of advertising. (Except for SEO. While I understand it, it can still bite me.)

Give it a name if you need to, tradigitalist, media agnostic, etc. I love it all. (It’s my own little version of Art Director’s Deficit syndrome.) I’ve been digging the opportunity to dabble in the podcast world and work within a rigid format like this. Consider it a rehearsal/forboding of other things to come.

It's also good to see a show from the inside and how you can pull people together from literally four corners of the globe using a free service like Skype—and some caffeine on a Sunday evening. (If, the globe had corners.) Is it the same as if we were all together in one room? No. No podcast with remote guests is because the dynamic is different. Not being able to read the reactions of others next to you so you know when to jump in takes getting used to, something which accounts for a slight lag or dead air at times between questions.

As for the actual show, Bob usually hits us up with topics the day before or day of along with extensive background articles. We have no idea until then what the show will cover. (See typical show notes page and referring links.) Generally, I scramble, read and review it all, then try and sound intelligent. Remembering too that ultimately it’s his show, I try to answer things accordingly and contain myself.

It has a different approach than I take here. That’s not good or bad, just sayin. So here, I swear a lot, there, it’s bleeped. (Something I forgot several times last night.) There, Bob riffs off Ad Age stories while I troll YouTube.

On a technical note, everything is done straight through in one take, recorded in his home studio with a real mic and mixer not the Staple’s $9.99 mic special either while the rest of us conference in. Little is edited except for s*** I let slip. Then he runs it through SoundSoap and adds compression to make us sound amazinger and to also hide the occasional Skype noises. (Helps too that the dude already has a voice for radio.) Further props as he jams for three-four hours after the show to edit it then get us back a complete set of links and notes for posting.

So listen, like, hate, discuss, whatever. Later kids.

Tags: The Beancast

Our smiling students are better than their smiling students.

Aka, more college selection process fun. Start with brochures. Pneumococcal patient or college undergrad? You decide! No difference in the images because they ALL use the same types. One thing that will never change, like, ever, is college brochure real fake fakery. (By the way, Go Tide! Even though I just grabbed your brochure at random—don’t hate.)

But every one either has a group in front of the student union happily throwing a frisbee—or a money shot of scenic mountain backdrop. In lieu of that, a close-up of ducks in the man-made pond in front of the library will do just fine.

Another thing that hasn’t changed is the damn introduction given parents and students during the open house. Sure, after driving for three hours, I’d love to sit for another hour in a warm auditorium—listening to the dean of agriculture read from a 120-page Powerpoint deck. (If that’s not a client meeting btw...) Like an ideal Presidential speech: Keep it short and sweet. Here’s the day, there are your guides, grab some coffee, bitches.

Standard issue intro aside, the biggest single factor in picking schools is shaping up to be one thing: Hospitality. Basically, when you show up for a tour or open house, does the school have its shit together. It’s easy to be jaded by pitches, offers and such because I spend time tearing that stuff apart, but when you actually have an experience that doesn’t suck, it stands out.

One school that we were hot on just got spanked/pwned/posterized after we toured another school we didn’t know much about and had almost written off. Wasn’t money, because the school runs slightly more. Wasn’t location, because it’s in God Clings to His Guns country and not exactly easy to get to.

It was the way they took the time to explain the school. Booths everywhere explaining things, free coffee and snacks every 20 feet. Those things aren’t the only factors of course. (Kinda like saying you should buy the car because of the balloons and free hot dogs.) The school still needs to have modern facilities and equipment, a decent teacher:student ratio and opportunities for a life. All things being equal though, the “show” matters.

(Of course once the school has our government-provided financial educational assistance funds, (student loans), it’s a different story. The beautiful student union grounds are trashed that first weekend and your kid’s iPod gets ripped-off. Until then, you can only “hope” life matches brochure.)

Actually going out of your way to answer a ton of questions, having a lot of admins and students available everywhere, (and to a person anyone was able to help), and scheduling repeat events throughout the day in case you missed one made the difference. (Add this shot and it was a win-win!)

Not sure what’s next, but the decision won’t be based on a brochure.

Told you mobile advertising was gonna be huge.

Literally. The car gods have shined down upon me twice now in two days. This just doesn’t happen. *high-fives self* While looking at colleges in Williamsport today, (the land of Little League), when what did I spy. Freaking NASCAR doesn’t have that many logos on their cars. Look closer and check out the speaker action on top for cruising the local strip and shouting it from the rooftops. Ouch. (Wonder what’s really in that “Free Quote.”) Whatever it is, all I know is I can’t wait for what tomorrow will bring.

Pennsylvania should feel proud tonight. Proud I say.

Welcome to my world.

Sometimes you gotta circle “life” in the subhead three, maybe four times.

We first spotted the beast while passing it on the way into the Sears parking lot, but missed the opportunity for a clean shot on. Sadly, we had failed. However, as we drove along the service road parallel to the great beast ahead of us the main road, our hope was renewed when it turned into Walmart. Because you never leave a man behind, we decided to make another attempt after buying what we originally came for. Purchase in hand, we made our way around the back of the Walmart parking lot. An angel must have been watching because there it was. A Captain Quint 25-footer. Click and appreciate what it is I go through every single day here. You’re welcome.

Death Metal Polka.

Best I could do Dave. Check out Wade Phillips on lead.

What the hell happened to beer advertising.

No, really. The Miller Lite banner ad copy is compelling enough, but then it takes you to a site with slickly animated ingredients and product attributes, and that’s all.

“The advertising it deserves” is right.

I miss these.

The soldier’s art.

“Soldiers take an oath to defend the Constitution, but let me tell you, what they’re really defending is libraries and museums and the memories of the human species, and that’s an awesome responsibility.”

Would you pay for Twitter?

It’s not really an easy yes or no question because if they go to a subscription service with extra features, you can still use Twitter basic. I’m split. Many sites already do the subscription thing, offering members stuff they can’t get elsewhere. Thing is, this kind of elitist attitude on social nets feels wrong, and is especially ironic given most of these were developed in California, historically a place where 60s hippie culture fostered a spirit of open community, no?

I’m not naive though, the net was never free because you always had to pay to access it. Selling ad space is also a necessary evil; many sites need to do it to survive. Still, internet access was always pay one price and you get to ride all you want for free. (With pay as you waste bandwidth on the rise, even that notion is dying.

But it’s likely that if Twitter pushes this through, you can see all the other social nets likely following, and ultimately, you could also see the development of an alternet movement to get us back to the idea of complete online “freeness.”

Although, if they do do it, it’ll be nice to see all the celebrity whores migrate and follow. Nothing will change because as I ranted previously, Britney Spears and THE_REAL_SHAQ still aren’t going to be following you, let alone talking to you. They’d pay to get away from people like you and me. You can just see a premium level of Twitter being created for the rarified air of the suggested follow list too. Still, just because you can afford to get in though doesn’t mean you get to hang with the cool kids.

(Another issue for another post, but what about brands that might go premium on any social net losing touch with everyday consumers, unless they offered people something cool for following?)

Tags: Twitter

Lol funny!

Everything’s ripe for parody, even 911 calls. K&G Fashion Superstore in Philly says several stations won’t run the spot though because it’s too upsetting for some. Yeah, sure, I mean, running an ad like this coupled with news stories about arson and murder would just put people over the top.

(Via Phillybikeboy.)

Danbury vs. Denver.

Plaid got to take part in a little Denver Egotist cross-promotional experiment today when they took over their blog. High-larry-tee ensues. Hurry over kids before it goes away for good and see what happens when Danbury tries to compete with Denver. (Okay, that whole Rocky Mountain range thing is hard to top, but Danbury has like, Dunkin’ Donuts and 7-Elevens.) Read more from guest contrtibution over there.

Mr. President, dude. With all due respect...

...speed that shit up. I went out and did four loads of laundry, fed the dog, mapped out a new solar system, came back, and you were still answering the first question. (Read the transcript here if you don’t believe me.) I’m guessing your offensive coordinator Rom Emmanual probably told you that by explaining the plans in great detail that you’ll win hearts and minds, unlike the previous administration’s limited access when it came to certain media.

Thing is, it’s coming off now like the account person who unsells an idea after the client signs off on it. Every answer to a direct question turns into you explaining your entire agenda and all the wonderful things you want to do... and do... and do. I appreciate careful, measured speech in a president, but it’s turning out to be the polar opposite of Bush’s shoot from the hip first—ask no questions later ways. Frustrating as hell.

It’s Newspaper Bailout Madness Here at D.C.’s Wild World of Loans!!!

Okay, so now we’re going to possibly bail out newspapers. Has Washington just lost their minds completely? I do not get this at all. When and where are you supposed to draw the line? If you didn’t see it, there was a video recently on the closing of the Rocky Mountain News that’s worth checking out. Two things in it jumped out at me and apply here.

First, the managing editor announces at one point that they will be closing the paper. He tells the newsroom in an emotional speech that the reporters had done nothing wrong, and that factors outside the newspaper’s control had brought this all on.

Secondly, several of the reporters were later interviewed about their future plans, and they questioned whether there was a place for them because people would not be able to get real reporting anymore.

Cue Chris Walken in True Romance with Dennis Hopper: “Come again?”

I hate watching anyone lose their job, but those two statements pointed out the absolute hubris and denial present in traditional media right now.

It’s not us, it’s everyone else.

So now, because newspapers haven’t changed the way they make money, an equally clueless Congress will throw funds at them to continue doing the same things over and over? That’s not rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic, that’s giving it a complete paint job as it’s going down.

One possible solution? TV.

It changes the way the news is reported, sure, but it doesn’t have to mean integrity takes a hit. (The long-running success of 60 Minutes proves this.) The TV option has always been there but I can only guess that The New York Times thought it was beneath them to try something that, in their eyes, diminished journalistic integrity. (I’m singling out the NYT here, but it could be any paper really.)

Why not try the NYT Channel?

If CNN can support an online presence with its TV ad revenue, then any major paper from around the country can survive on TV. People have local cable news shows just for the weather while getting news from multiple sources. The National Geographic expanded to TV successfully, as well as that other long-running print edition the Bible, which has spun off how many different religious shows?

If they can do it...

There’s enough cable channels to go around too. Even with 68 reality shows covering home improvement or 30 channels of World’s Greatest Animal Crashes, there’s enough bandwidth left for intelligent programming. Think about what top reporters would bring to the table. People complain now about a lack of fair and balanced reporting on TV, well, having a name like the NYT definitely addresses that issue.

They would do the type of reporting found on many cable shows now. No longer would you be limited to an in-depth look at sports from HBO or ESPN’s Outside The Lines because you could it in one place.

More competition is more better.

You’d also still have a secondary network in place consisting of many blogs currently depending on the major print and online media for their daily rants. That doesn’t go away simply because your paper is now a cable channel.

Or another idea is to try the Kindle as distribution system. Bundle the newspaper in a downloadable form with the reader for your particular market. Reporters could also send out Kindle-only stories not available anywhere else in edition to their blogs/columns online with a subscription model. Start out with a pilot program first.

Or, since Google already has a network in place, and the NYT name carries weight, hire former staffers as iReporters and pay them to report the news directly through a special partnership involving Google’s latest push into the territory.

Those are just three ideas that could easily work and salvage the concept of newspapers as people know them. Like record labels, the newspaper industry doesn’t have to go away, it just has to morph into something else more relevant.

Yeah, I could see how it’s been so hard for the newspaper industry to figure this stuff out. What with them probably out reporting real stories and all.

Or should newspapers have their hand out like all the others?

A true wtf from Sonic.

At first that’s what you’ll say about The Low Dough Variety Show, but watching executions like Dollah Pants and you see it supports the $1 dollar value theme, even if it does feel too slickly produced and all fake white urbany ‘n shit. Hey, it’s Sonic. Next time let’s get some waitresses on rollerblades doing Jackass stunts. Or not. But seriously, two talking guys in a car is different for fastfood chain advertising, but the true unique thing about the chain itself is never mentioned in ads. If they’re so embarassed by it, then lose them. Pretty sure the waitstaff wouldn’t mind an end to countless near-misses while flying by with food trays.

Tags: Sonic

Mini does Bud.

That’s what this Mini work from Plantage in Germany feels like. It’s probably ok though because you expect a little looseness with the brand and this kind of execution. (Atom Films comparisons notwithstanding.)

Tags: BMW Mini

Hey, Santa doesn’t stop advertising just because it’s March.

I tell you, click links, you find stuff. But do you listen? No. You’re too busy reading rehashed blog posts from Thought Leaders™ and self-proclaimed marketing experts. If you’d just do what I say you’d find stuff like Realsantas.com on your own. I was researching a post on Danbury for The Denver Eogist tomorrow when I came across this quote: “She must have caused a commotion over there.” I bet. Which then lead me to the place to go for professional Santas anywhere in the country! (They have summer Santas and even “Premium” Santas.)

You’re welcome.

Next up, a Snuggie™ for pets?

Not sure what’s worse. That they have a Snugglette for kids, or that the site is actually more net savvy in terms of sharing capabilties than some major brands I’ve seen won’t let me control the autoplay feature, forcing you to go watch it on there.

(Tip to Zeke for scarring me.)

Tags: Snuggie, Snugglette

What we can learn from outsourcing China’s used condoms.

Not much. So Alabama will lose about 300 jobs as the U.S. now looks to China for its American Made™ condoms, a growth industry there apparently. (And Dov turned that gig down? AA brand condoms—Laid in America.) Digging deeper, not sure this will be successful: Alabama has about 4.5 million people, China, 1.5 BILLION. Looks like Alabama’s condoms might be working just a little better, no? (Note to China, only one hole per condom, please.) Not to mention what they do with used product.

(Image via.)

“Look, we’re not saying you’re gonna end up in a mountain or anything.”

“But if you do, it sure won’t be our fault.” I miss car talk radio. Pick a cause and there’s an ad running for it. Like... the National Air Traffic Controllers Association. It’s a nice, friendly spot, setting you up with the jab—before coming over the top with a crushing left. Enjoy!

You will die if you go to SXSW and change your name to SyxSyw.

Those and other urban legends. This week, I try and keep up with Host Bob™, Ben Kunz, Brian Morrissey from Adweek, and Hal Goodtree. Rants include why SciFi > SyFy will suck, why AIG is just the tip of the give back your profits iceberg, and how awesome 10,000 people Twittering the same damn thing from sxsw is. (Skype also finally caught up with me this week. If I sound like I’m stopping abruptly at times and trailing off—more than usual—it was because I could only hear every other word on delay when talking, which really threw my timing off. Excuses now over, we return you to the show.)

Download it directly here. Topics here. You can also follow us Twitter: TheBeanCast, mtlb, benkunz, bmorrissey and hal990.

Tags: The Beancast

455 gallons of paint is a lot of paint.

But it’s still a cool effect. New spot for Acura paints an entire revolving city scene while the car stands still.

“Hey baby wake up from your a sleep.”

And the Thompson Twins got more attention than Zlad? Amazing.

It’s not like HeavenorHell.net was taken.

On the road today. Had to stop and circle back for this gem. Forget the cryptic copy that leads nowhere. A phone number but no url? This world really is going to **** and a handbasket.

Calling all BROs.

Moving up doesn’t have to mean selling out. Be an All-Pro Bro. No, really. Now you can still be The Man while working for The Man.

Word, playa.

(Tip to Darryl.)

It’s not a Mac, but...

Clients sometimes expect the impossible or have unrealistic expectations about their brands. How many times are you given an assignment for something that has a lot going against it in terms of negative perceptions.

But the nature of advertising is such that you don’t always get to pick the ideal client or product, yet you accept the challenge anyway. Not that you can make Windows cool per se in this case, but maybe trying to get some attention for the brand and inject a little life is enough at this point considering how long people have dogged it.

Lotta people gave the early Seinfeld work crap for being different, but I wanted to see where it went, because I figured it’d make an interesting case study down the road if they were able to change some of those perceptions. (When asked early in the run about the campaign, Crispin wasn’t able to talk about specific objectives because of confidentiality issues, so you’re left to speculate as to what their strategy was.)

The campaign though is well into that next phase and is doing what I thought would always be a good move: presenting Windows’ users as everyday people and not just cubicle dwelling slaves to “The Man.”

Yep, Apple has the cool thing down. The shit’s just engineered into its DNA so you don’t really have to work hard in ads to sustain that message. Windows? Nowhere near as intuitive as a Mac, or arguably as cool, but it does have the market. (Tell me Jobs is really happy with 5% of the market.)

My other theory in part blames the IBMs of the world for saddling Microsoft with this worker cubicle drone baggage that the majority of computing/tech spots tend to have. All the dark, lifeless commercials about enterprise solutions, generic business solutions or (insert solution) have done more than enough to paint the entire PC world as, well, dark and lifeless. Windows couldn’t help but be boring by association. Changing that perception would be a major task for anyone.

Still, where Mac took the understated cool/easy-to-use approach in the Mac vs. PC work, this is just as genuine, albeit in a different way: Kids using technology and playing on their own the way kids do. I was watching the NCAAs this weekend and trying not to get killed in the brackets as this series ran all day. It's simple, direct and drives you to a site to continue that vibe.

Make Microsoft relevant, even cool. Yeah, I know, a lot of people say they should focus on making the product work, first. Well, when as an agency the client won’t let you do the latter, all you can do is either walk away or focus on the former.

Tags: Windows photo gallery

Because gays and their gay games will make the world gay.

“ITS ADAM AND EVE NOT ADAM AND STEVE.” Wow, hey, thanks for the heads-up. Well, with copywriting like that, not too hard to figure out where most people fall in the comments section of this story. Hasbro’s classic board game is now a downloadable version with the option for playas to choose male or female spouses. And legions arose to protest.

*yawn* Aren’t we past this shit yet? Apparently not. So read through all the love from World Net Daily minions if you want, but credit here though to Hasbro for not caving in and reacting to the panic. Imagine that. They actually did nothing.

But, this got me thinking, if Life can change it up for the net, what about other classics? Maybe for the online version of Monopoly the banker dude can’t take it anymore and jumps from his penthouse down on Park Avenue. Wait, he’d never do that. He’d go to jail, then get a book deal. But I’m sure you can think of other scenarios for classic games...

(HINT, HINT)

Tweet this.

That’s why sci-fi authors stick to writing.

Tags: Ray Bradbury

Which implodes first?

Just a hunch, but could one of these be left behind by next year?

I love this guy.

What more can you say. Who needs advertising talk when you have a walking reality show at your disposal? 21 minutes in people. 21 minutes.

Only on:

.









Tags: Facebook, craigslist, eBay, Amazon, Wiki, MySpace

If there was ever a day to walk away from blogging?

Today would be it. Go share a brainfreeze with friends.

I, um, oh nevermind.

Well, I leave this new effort to support Internet Explorer 8 in your capable hands. If that’s not enough, please feel free to partake in the DVD extras here.

George Lucas is the Anti-Christ.

Maybe. But he does know his way around a movie set. I doubt Satan would’ve gotten licensing rights to all those Star Wars toys either.

But wait, there’s more.

– Seriously, just give these dudes an A right now.
– Axe chocolate body rub love thing.
– More coulda, woulda, shoulda Pepsi love.
– Promotionally speaking? Give the Bible guy cred for including a url.
– You could spend your life listening to gurus.
– Google is handjobs and Democracy, mister. No, it is.
...(Bonus for the alliteration straight flush with five W’s!)
– “Able to navigate through the computer.” Future TRONs apply now.
– Awesome: The Mona Greasa.
– Submit your Top 3 ad cliches of today.
– Texting, calling, painting?
– Page for page, British tabloids have the finest newsploitation around.
– Release your inner Jacob.
– Hourville = hookers finally get off Craigslist and onto the “social”
..interwebz. (With the assist.)
– Timberland is urban upscale now? Why don’t you people tell me
..these things sooner.
– Go meet some more meat.
– Parents, talk to your kids about bracelets, before the streets do.
– The Lone Gunmen and I have been saying this for years.
– Fortnightly, smartass.
– Jameson calls flyover country home.
– Well, Alaska HAS been getting a little full of themselves lately.
– Love the internet and it loves you back.
– Morgans Hotel Group returns from finger giving to
..recession session help.

Jet happy on the way to Washington for your bailout.

In times like these, Jetblue helps bigwhigs adjust to life among the commoners.

(Via phillybikeboy.)

Fred did it. YOU can do it.

What’s a vintage training film without a dramatic lead-in.

It could be an SNL skit.

A Stuart Smalley for this generation.

Real creatives don’t use Twitter—they just fire up some Smarties.

And other near-topics like that. New podcast is up with me, John Wall and Ken Wheaton from Ad Age. For those of us who aren’t at sxsw, we stayed around Sunday to talk about schoolbusvertising, why Hulu will never compete with alchol-fueled stunts on YouTube, and Bogusky leaving Twitter. (Many creatives aren't on Twitter and other sites like Facebook for similar reasons, not the least of which is that they just don’t have time. Least that’s what my informal survey says.) Then we get into teenage smoking. Of Smarties. Not a shock really. Kids are like convicts. They have all day to figure out shit like this. Give them a week, they’ll build a rocket out of cans of Lemon Pledge and a lawn chair.

Download the show directly here. Topics here. (Subscribe through iTunes here.) You can also follow us on Twitter: TheBeanCast, mtlb, John and Ken.

Tags: The Beancast

“Let me get two herpes please.”

Trojan uses reverse STD psychology in a new promo.

(Nothing more to see here, move along.)

How to Report Atheists to the FBI.

Because it’s Sunday, you need some religious religion from Deacon Fred. Like how to spot atheists. God-ignoring atheists. (Or Wiccans.) Also check out the home base of Landover Baptist Church, and, like the Vatican, their YouTube channel too. Coming soon? A museum.

(Via.)

Wait, where are the nearly naked models?

Dov threw me for a loop. Am I supposed to feel good that Dov = jobs... in times like these?

Dov’s messing with us.

Nothing to Snicker at.

Just now saw the story about Mars shutting down an unofficial Snckrz! site from Poke.com. Mars says they didn’t give permission for their logo and brand to be used in the way it was. (Agency Spy and Creativity weighed in too.)

When still live, it allowed users to mess with the logo and create their own message in the candy’s font, something playing off their campaign currently running shown above. (Various outdoor and print ads have different takes on hunger and snacking themes using a range of words.)

Poke CD Tom Aiello developed this idea while at Agency.com, (of Subway pitch fame). Whatever people think of that though, and while this might seem ironic considering what Mars is claiming, I think Poke got robbed here.

This wasn’t some brandjacking that denigrated the product, this played off what Snickers was already doing—for free. 80,000+ users free. People on YouTube do things with products every day without permission from the brand.

Diet Coke and Mentos should have settled the issue a long time ago; two guys messing with a brand without initial approval. This should’ve opened the floodgates for brands to have people do whatever they will, but I guess not.

Anyone giving Skittles props for their Modernista! homage needs to neg Mars here. If you preach endlessly about how brands can’t control the message anymore, this is a perfect example of what happens when you try.

What they won’t be able to control is the negative backlash. YouTube mashup madness where people just do what they want will only get worse. Should an agency know better and not try these stunts, especially one they don’t work for?

Who said? We give props to idiots with rubber Snakes on a Plane blogs or dudes playing in an iPhone band because somehow, these are examples of “consumer evangelists brand loyalists” raising up! Whoo-hoo! But let an agency try the same thing and holy shit.

Skittles was the one who brandjacked other social media sites to load as their own, yet that was okay. (And, that concept was originally an idea tossed around for Agency.com’s own self-promo. They wanted to redo a series of brands and feature it as they’re own homepage.)

All this did was take an existing campaign and stretched it at no cost to the brand, (save for the time it took Mars legal to send an email). It also showed some of the agency’s self-promo chops. Ya think in times like these, the brand would appreciate the free exposure.

At the very least, Mars just ended up giving Poke some exposure.

(Image via.)

Scanning Drudge.

Yellow teeth are back! And, in case they do manage to take your guns, you can at least move up into the hills near me and plant that Survival Seed garden you always wanted. Of course, you won’t have anything to defend it with except maybe a pitchfork. While we’re at it, we can look for oil. (After we’re done using babies as pawns of course.)

But wait, there’s more.

.
– Living room heroes—can house concerts save the record biz?
– You still suck at Photoshop.
– Who needs melody when we have lyrics.
– Hey, cool, let me try this. They’ll never know it’s me.
– Learn to play from, um, the ones who make the guitar.
– He’s the fan who runs onto the field and expects them to let him coach.
– Nothing is original.
– Which type of Facebook friend are you?
– Packaging that gets to the point. (Via.)
– Count the marketing cliches here and win a burger.
– When readers riot.

Overheard internet.

Because the internet is cool, honest or sad:
___________________

“I had a college friend who got arrested for wandering into some girls apartment and passing out on her couch. She then wrote a rant about it on Craigslist. seriously, people.” – Thistledew
___________________

“iphone, trust me guys its waterproof go try it!” – Seightan
___________________

“I hate the damn multigrain commercial. If that woman was my wife, I'd slap the shit out of her. although, im 15.. but either way, she's a bitch. For the love of God, let the man talk! That commercial made me stay away from cheerios. Damnit, she's a itch. Assuming things without fucking listening to a damn word. Dickhole.” – untypoed

___________________

“tracy morgan is one of the greatest atheletes of all time” – caveman357
___________________

“We're going backwards. In the old days, they used to call these "telegrams," and they were delivered at your door. You paid by the word so you kept it simple.” – russianhiller
___________________

“Cornell took it to 11 here. Just needed two more base players and a violin.” – xhyio
___________________

“This makes sense now. I always thought red barchetta was the name of his uncles tractor... Which I though was quite a crap thing to write a song about. I guess I don't really pay much attention to the lyrics in rush songs.” – brownpants69
___________________

“I'd go and inject him personally if it would make him hit in the playoffs” – tophermurphy
___________________

“ok i dont reli know bout him.” – 1leahlolly

You mean the government actually got something right?

Okay, with typical governmental speed, it took the Federal Trade Commission a few years to address the misconceptions thrown around in consumer credit ads, but at least they got the message right in these spots: Everyone by law is entitled to a free credit report from each of the three credit bureaus at AnnualCreditReport.com.

While singing pirates are cute, they mask that little fact by, uh, not mentioning it in the ad or at their site, where, by the way, you can sign up for their credit monitoring service and then discover the small print about that “free” report. (Having used credit monitoring service due to a Blue Cross snafu, I will say a monitoring service and the extras they offered go beyond the free report.)

One thing: While the Apartment spot above gets right to that point, the Irish Jig spot is a little too cute for it's own good and waits to deliver on that message. Because of that, I think people will be fooled into thinking it’s another freecreditreport.com spot and tune it out.

Normally, I hate ads that attack competitors because they’re usually weak. (Think anything by Subway or Quiznos.) Here though, even the parodies are soft on the attack part, they work because the government is actually trying to watch out for consumers instead of some stern warning. (I also have to give them “credit” for making it easy to grab the videos and/or audio clips in a number of ways including a YouTube page. Lotta brands can’t manage that trick.)

Now, if they could just focus on loud commercials next.

Sketch or die.

Via.

Musikvergnuegen’s syndrome.

Weak wordplay even by my standards but I can’t resist a press release with a name like that. Ready to toss it but checked out the site and it’s stuff you ignore: Audio logos. The less than galmerous little 5-second clips that play whenever a logo appears on something you watch. (Better name for them might be taglines, but, whatever. (The ones above were created by Musikvergnuegen.) But the real reason I posted? Try and click all the clips so they play at once before the first one stops.

?

?

In logo Mode.

Flipping through the reader yesterday for stuff and came across a story about Obama’s new logo. “...American Recovery and Reinvestment Act (ARRA), and the second for the U.S. Department of Transportation’s TIGER (Transportation Investment Generating Economic Recovery...” and so on. As someone noted, the purpose here wasn’t to show how we can spend tax dollars on money, rather, President Obama’s use of branding. If people at least see a stamp on something they paid for, they'll at least feel like they’ve done something with the stimulus loan money. Which in turn leads to more confidence. Old SPICE confidence, mister.

Then I caught this part “...led designers Aaron Draplin and Chris Glass in the assignment....”

I don’t know Chris, or Mode Project who ran things, but I do know Aaron from having met him on last year’s subtle plug for latest tour coming up Plaidnation.com tour. As a designer, if you haven’t checked out his blog, go now Agent Starling. Seek out design truth. (Check out Chris too, definitely worth the visit.)

I thought it was cool that instead of me profiling another high-profile agency/designer who got millions for redoing mass market consumer goods Olympic logo packaging, I can instead give props to someone who absolutely appreciates the art of graphic design and the influence it’s had on America.

Read through any of Aaron’s posts, check out his simple Field Notes idea or view his Flickr collections where he hits garage sales searching for lost design America and you’ll understand his passion.

So when I saw the logo, I needed more background as the release was short on details. Turns out due to a Black Helicopters clause, Aaron can’t say anything about his specific involvement other than to say that he was involved. He did tell that he’ll eventually be able to tell more about it, a logo tell-all if you will.

But if I had to guess which one he did based on seeing the design he features on his blog, I’d say he did the Recovery Act logo on the left. It appears as traditional as anything from the past but clean and simple enough to fit with today’s simple Twitter 2.0 esthetic. In short, it harkens. I said harkens.

And that I'm guessing is probably what they wanted. Something timeless that can instill confidence in people, not just this generation, but the generations before who remember how things were with the economy. Ultimately, everyone would agree that a logo won’t do that if the basic program it’s for doesn’t work.

Logos can only mean as much as we impart on them, based in no small part on how we feel about the product. (The Swastika and Enron symbols were cool once too.)

As Recovery money hits the streets, it’s too soon to see what effect it will have. All I know is if the plan doesn’t work, it won’t be Aaron’s fault.


Tags: TIGER, ARRA