Hey, they’re doing cool stuff with tools.

Sears is one of those odd stories. A brand once made up of its own exclusive brands like Craftsman, DieHard and Kenmore. No news there. Many retailers have had their own *house* brand. But then came big box mixapalooza and before you knew it, you could buy almost any brand at Sears, and then so much for exclusive. Those names still had real recognition though, and still do.

Recently, Craftsman has been running some spots doubling as virals. The new one has dudes with various tools creating different noises all edited together. Think Stomp with cordless drills. In addition, you can make your own remix version here. Yea integration! It’s a very basic mash site to say the least, but okay, it gets you spending time with the brand as you share it with friends.

As a user of Craftsman tools and power tools in general however, I wondered how many people in the audience this resonated with. Not people who like clever gimmicks and stunts; that alone is a broad demo. I mean people who would actually use Craftsman.

TV blasts a message to the widest possible audience in one shot; no news there either. Maybe this is more about planning and strategy. Yes it’s cool to watch, and yes it creates a puts a stamp on tool ads, but it could be for any tool brand. If people are calling into question the sales effectiveness of Old Spice ads, what about the basic awareness of the brand in this case.

The line of tools they’re showing is for renovation and construction work, even though Craftsman tools have traditionally been synonymous with auto repair. (Shhh. No, it’s okay, they have been.) As a tool guy, I use or own Black & Decker, DeWalt, Makita, Ryobi, Stanley, and yes, even a few Craftsman tools.* While I don’t favor one brand over the other, I always knew that if I ever needed a socket, then I’m using Craftsman or Snap-on.

Without access to the brief, all I can guess is that the brand wanted to penetrate the weekend warrior demo and create awareness of Craftsman as more than just an automotive choice. Maybe there was an element of this is not your dad’s Craftsman anymore too.

Branching off on that point for a second, if that is the case here, I’d have to disagree. How do you walk away from the heritage of a name just because you want to freshen it up? That may work for Old Spice, but tools are rites of passage. Something you learn about from your dad. That’s a heritage dynamic you find in few categories.

Tools also brought to bear this mindset of American Made. If your old man was showing you the right way to use certain tools, you can bet it also came with a rant on the quality of American tools and the inferiority of everything else. It’s a message Detroit and others like Levi’s have been trying to hammer home these days (no pun).

Tradition isn’t something to always walk away from; it has value. Peers may matter, but you’ll listen to dad before you listen to anyone else. Now, is the national pride dynamic less of an issue these days? It is for me. I know plenty of contractors who use non-American made tools.

That’s not to say it still isn’t a huge issue. It underscores a duality in advertising that hasn’t been resolved: Are we global or aren’t we? If we are, then stfu and let’s just buy the best tool no matter who makes it or where it comes from. If we aren’t, then hello consumer isolationism because Made In America is back, RAH!

Well, which is it?

You can’t confuse customers with a commercial about a hybrid telling you to love the planet on one hand, and then turn around and give a hi-performance finger to the fuel economy of imports. What’s an import anymore? The Toyota your dad once railed against is now built in Indiana and driven by moms full of swagger. LA soccer moms represent, yo.

Getting back to the spot, what reinforces the Craftsman name for people beyond using a lot of red and associating it with a few memorable tricks? Not to single out Sears either, because this is done by nearly all agencies at some point when they can’t find a way into a brand. They either look to *own* a general aspect of a given category the way Kleenex owned therapy with couch conversations, or like Craftsman here, they just do something cool with the product.

This works as long as you don’t always depend on the technique. Even though Red Bull is a stunt brand, its general market campaign could easily be at home for a Dunkin’ Donuts. DieHard also does the stunt ad thing but then, tests under extreme conditions have always been a part of their heritage. Reggie Watts works because he’s still showing the product’s dependability in a unique way.

This is just guys throwing tools around. I might as well be throwing shit into the back of an F-150.

Someone anonymous commented recently about the relevance of TV and the changing consumer dynamic, and while I don’t recall the specific blog, their point was this: Build the campaign around the experiences of your audience by listening to what they need. Don’t blast them with your product message and all its shiny new features. Old news for some, but is it? How many brands still ignore that and go right for the close-up product porn, as if you’ll run out and buy it just because they show it.

Like the drill in that cool new Stanley Tools music spot.

*A cordless 18v drill and circular saw, bitches.

Because life without TV is just life.

It’s not easy selling in a new medium. But TV was special. It made life better.

Moms say the damndest things.

Proving it’s harder for parents to control what comes out of their kids’ mouths, 8th Continent Soymilk has about one of the truest commercials on parenthood I’ve ever seen. At the end of the day, mom can only control what comes out of her mouth and what’s in her fridge. Unless this spot is running locally though, one word in it probably guarantees it never sees the light of TV day. (Unless we help them blow that shit up viral big.) Too bad, because it’s a funny spot. While there’s a requisite Facebook and Twitter, the site has a fresh feel and clean design with a personality most dickhead consumer product sites lack. They’re also giving away a year’s worth of housekeeping services through Merry Maids. Solid integration, just the way mom would do it.

A buyer’s market.

“We are one of the premier sites for professional women and seeking a full-time editor/marketer. Must be in New York City--this is not a virtual job. Responsibilities include expanding the reach of the website and our member network through social media and marketing liaisons, writing and editing content for the website and newsletters, and managing interns. Qualified individuals must be versed in social networking and have marketing savvy, be an excellent writer with good people skills. Should have five years of formal work experience, including writing/editing copy. Knowledge of Microsoft Office and Excel are required, HTML a plus. Salary: $40-50,000.00 depending upon experience. Send resume, references, one writing sample (preferably a profile), with a thoughtful cover letter. Please address it to Helene.”

I have no doubt someone will jump on this. While not a $70k gig at Saatchi, it has a fair amount of responsibilities. Does “premier site for professional women” mean Monster? A regional site? Who knows. Just seems like there are a ton of these ads out now lacking a deep understanding of social media gigs. They don’t know what they don’t know. It seems primarily an editor more than social media gig, but still, do you ever wonder about Scott Monty’s coding chops? Shouldn’t the face of your company, the person who will build your network, control your messaging, and do everything else you threw in the ad last-second, shouldn’t they be worth more than $50K?

(Tip, Tontino.)

Apple’s iPorn war.

Steve might have to let this one go and just claim mission accomplished. Soon as I saw Facetime on the iPhone 4, I knew it would hamper iGod’s desire to keep porn out of Apple devices. I never got his whole argument though. Desktops and laptops have always let you see whatever you want, so banning adult content in the iTunes store just drives people to Firefox or Safari for the free stuff. (Maybe his small victory here is in the more closed confines of the iPod, iPhone and iPad.)

Either way, for Jobs to accomplish his porn-freetopia, it quickly becomes a Big Brother issue. The only way to reach it is with a ban at the ISP level, which would raise huge censorship and free speech issues. Craigslist ads which skirt sex trade policies are one thing, but telling two consenting adults what they can and can’t, um, *exchange* in a private video chat?

He’s not that stupid.

As has been said of new technology throughout the years, adult content tends to drive its adoption. Aka, early adopters are geeks who can’t get dates and need porn. That unscientific blog theory aside, this is not just an Apple problem.

The promise of a teleconferencing future eventually meant people were going to have to deal with seeing each other, and not just talking. And like most office technology that finds its way into homes, did anyone not think real-time video would be next?

The fear people once had of being seen working from home in their underwear has been trashed thanks to Chatroulette. Forget fear, hell, people expect to be seen in their underwear there—and less. Underscoring the point about technological adoption and adult content, the service, like some social networks, finds itself scrambling to eliminate the pervs, and not for any sense of moral righteousness either. (If this was the case, they would’ve addressed this from the start and not embrace it the way they did.)

Porn though tends to scare away advertisers. Duh. But the operating Catch-22.0 seems to be: I use porn to build traffic to get on the radar of advertisers, but now I need to stop relying on it so I can attract....

And maybe this is Jobs’ fear. I don’t doubt he’s offended from a moral perspective; he’s said as much in the past. But while adult content may be big business, it tends to get in the way when you’re going after Proctor & Gamble on a new ad platform.

Lose the overall war just to win the iPorn fight. Mission accomplished.

Cinematographer vs. producer.

“We bought Final Cut Pro and a laptop.” Little too much inside jargon, but cute in places with a few truisms about shortcuts that hit home. (Tip to Tontino.)

Overheard internet.

Yep, they said it...

“anyone else think the american dream is when bill murray invites you to go out for a beer and you run into tina fey and she’s like, can i tag along? and you three have the time of your life? just shooting the ‘ol breeze, then bill excuses himself, and takes off and your left with just tina, and she gives you the ‘eye’...you know? you know what i mean? this is why i wish 'inception' were real ya’ll.”
– holdenfunk


“114 thumbs down?! You all can burn in hell.”
– cuseter


“Any person who thinks the people on the video laughing at the thought of “I didn’t give him” all that I could or the thought of showing the farmer the way to more “of his kind” as racists should be quiet. You don’t get it. You won’t. I laughed too the first time I heard the speech. It’s not what I would do to a person – It’s not what she did to the farmer – but as a black business owner, I’ve had many white men tell me that I should do business with more of “my kind” in the community “where I belong.” The thought of telling a white guy the same was funny, but not right. If you hear what she said, that’s what the WHOLE speech was about. Don’t let your blind hatred for the President or the NAACP because you to jump on anything those other haters tell you to believe. If you want to point at Mrs. Sherrod because you think the Tea Party was unfairly called racist by the NAACP, don’t shoot the cashier at Wal-Mart because you picked up a box with broken dishes.”
– DL Stewart


“they make the clips look so bad-ass with the title, “kangaroo vs dingo” like wtf, just make it a “kangaroo out runs a dingo” and i wont watch it”

– Mohamed518


“What a missed opportunity for not including Whistler and his mother.”
– franCo.

“dog attacks would become an issue at some point i reckon. this guy definately cheated.”
– projectoutdream

NFL reverses its call on gambling in ads—sorta.

Remember when Kia got into trouble after the Super Bowl for showing a casino interior in an ad? Well, they still can’t, but they can show more of the exterior! “What happens here, stays here” messaging is still banned from appearing in games, but the league has modified it’s policy enough to allow more of the city in general to be shown. It allows the following:

“General advertising from a state or municipal lottery, provided that such lottery organization does not offer any betting scheme that is based on real sporting events or performances in them; general advertising from horse- or dog-racing tracks, or from state or municipal off-track betting organizations, provided that such horse-racing, dog-racing or off-track betting establishment offers neither betting schemes based on real sporting events (other than horse or dog races) or performances in them or casino games of any kind; or general advertising for tourist destinations, including Las Vegas …”

What is still banned though:

“Gambling-related advertising, including, without limitation, advertising for any hotel, casino or other establishment that houses gambling regardless of whether the advertising references gambling, as well as any advertising that would violate the terms of the league’s television agreements or policy on gambling advertising …”

So basically, you can add a vegas.com url to your spots? I guess that’s good news for those non-gambling related businesses in Vegas—all 1.5% of them. People, it’s about the little victories... IT JUST IS.

He used a wingman once, just to see how it felt.

He also wondered once if those clever Dos Equis ads ever moved product, just to see how it felt. The most interesting wingman is back after remaining vigilant for rain and fountains of youth, and staying thirsty as ever.

But if you take away the topless beer models, the terrorists win.

The right to bare beer is a God-given right! Oh wait, that’s here, not Austria. So I guess the protest over a beer and its topless women ad, a beer by the way that you never heard of until now, and one likely to get far more traffic than it otherwise might, can continue. (Don’t forget to picket their website too.) Carry on Hirter Bier! Carry on, Austria!

But wait, there’s more

- What other kind of business card would a model company have?
- Every cigarette smoked in Mad Men.
- Hey Whipple, interview this.
- What about a manual for a 1991...
- Pilchards are supposed to be good for you.
- We *may* be eating too much butter.
- Did this tweet merit a $70K copywriting job?
- The early tweet gets the...
- Out of sunblock? Cover yourself in kitchen magnets.
- Because an ad agency can create world peace.
- Nightowls welcome.
- A picture worth a million words.
- GoogleTunes.
- Back in the blue.
- The first “A”—NYC restaurant inspection information. (Via.)
- Coffeewriter wanted: hot liquid hope.

She likes her tequila likes she likes her men?

Going down uncommonly smooth... what? I see the premium tequila category has a manufactured attitude (like vodka or other spirits), but these 901 Silver Tequila spots directed by Justin Timberlake feel smug. They’re almost preachy and on par with Ketel One’s real man vibe. I think YouTube folk have a decent grasp on things though:

“This commercial is about cake and bl*w jobs.”

“This would be awesome... IF it felt like she actually understood the import of what she was saying.”

“I like this commercial for some reason. But I still prefer vodka.”

Set phasers to permanent press.

Star Trek—it’s what’s for sci-fi. Star Wars may be all over the place now, Star Trek is the sci-fi franchise that just won’t die.* As with any series or movie in the genre, there are always the toy commercials or fast-food tie-ins for happy meals, but a laundry detergent? One to Cheer up, Scotty. This 1969 P&G spot is about the oddest product tie-in to a show without actually mentioning the show. There are no stars or actual costumes from the series except an odd Spock sound bite near the end, even though the sound effects are there. (Including Cable Guy Medieval Times fight sequence horns!) There’s no mistaking that opening door sound. Then from the fanboy department, check out this short made by some kids in 1978 who came back years later as adults and dubbed in their voices. Or maybe you prefer a little Star Trek as A-Team spoof. You know you do.

*Like that old lady with the 5-digit license plate, you know that shit’s old. All the characters each went by one name: Bones, Chekov, Kirk, Scotty, Spock, Sulu and Uhura.

Come for the salvation—stay for the howllelujah.

“Adding comments has been disabled for this video.”

Mister, we don’t need any. You’re welcome.

(Via.)

“Back in my day, we didn’t have basements, we called them bomb shelters.”

Cue angry old man shaking his fist at the whippersnappers. The only global warming we feared came via air raid siren. Bomb shelters are getting a 3.0 upgrade though, (if they ever really *left* certain parts of this country). Trust, nuclear attack drills were common in schools up to the early ’70s. Siren goes off—you hid under your desk, in a corner or the basement down the hall. If you were at home, you’d go to your basement slash bomb shelter. (The one with the thin steel door that was obviously impervious to the effects of the atom.) All I know is after watching The Road and Book of Eli, my new-fashioned shelter won’t be equipped with the latest Ikea Fallout line without first stocking up on the Glock.*

And a shit-ton of ammo.

*And when the end does come, there will be no need for blogs.

AdVerve 41 - Shark Attacks and Animorphs

Play the show now.

Media Monitors Strategic Community Manager and Oz native Deb Wiseman, a.k.a. @wisey joins us for an epic conversation spanning from social media analytics, to politicians' use of new media, to whether Australia is really the most dangerous place in the world to live.

Oh yeah, there is some amazing shapeshifter/animorphs action in there too. But we didn't tell you that; you discovered it for yourself. FAIL TO LISTEN AND YOU WILL NEVER LEARN THE SECRETS OF ANIMAL SPIRIT TRANSFER.

By the way, POLL TAHM!


Subscribe via

Topics:

00:00 – Advertising works, we believe!
21:03 – The lying liars
34:16 – Let’s go to Australia
46:26 – Mel’s torment redux
54:50 – Commercials killed the video star
01:00:43 – Sydney wildlife—get some!
01:12:01 – Stay off subways/Wrap

Linkage:

• Wisey’s blog, The Digestif.
• Drunk man tries riding crocodile.
• Spy-Mart.
  
• Facts on jellyfish (the ultra-bad one to which Deb refers is the Irukandji).
• Robber who lies about shark bite to hide theft.
• Australia’s 2010 federal election on Twitter.
• Who’s leading the Aussie elections? Follow on Tweetlevel.
• Fun and colourful federal election graph.
• Angela’s squid nightmare clip.
• French politicians using new media to tear each other new assholes.

Send questions or comments to advervepodcast [at] gmail [dot] com. You can also leave a review.

The future we never had.

(Wherein I honor Jetpack’s disappointment in a failed utopian vision of the future.)

Because mangled English grammar with funny accents still wins.

Even if DIRECTV’s service was a fail in our house, love your spot! And that’s all that matters, eh Sergei?

(Agency: Grey NY.)

I need a guy with an iPod in a dress in a mask.

Awkward stock photos. It’s a rite of passage for art directors. If you can make your way through an endless collection of themes that David Lynch couldn’t even dream up with and remain sane, you win. Enjoy. (Tip to Eliza.)

Facebook lets Kanye finish.

And the only thought I have about Kanye West rapping at Facebook is, well, three actually: First, the stupid comments people shooting shaky things like this usually make were kept to an absolute minimum. Second, if it’s some new partnership between Kanye + Facebook, are they trying too hard to be cool. It’s still two different worlds in one room there. Lastly though, it take that many people to run Facebook? Makes it easy to believe how monolithic this company is getting. That’s a lot of people depending on *valuation* for their livelihoods.

(Via.)

Meet the new boss, same as...

Wow. Where do you start. One thing I thought BP would’ve gotten by now about damage control is to simply stop putting its foot in its mouth and just apologize every time a mic is around. But new CEO Robert Dudley never got that email. Citing BP’s “Unprecedented corporate response,” as well as the things on the bucket list that are in “BP’s long-term interest,” do they get it yet? Unprecedented? Like, here’s an atta’ boy? The spill was unprecedented, so the response had better be too. Right now, the U.S. doesn’t want to hear anything other than the company is putting their interests first, not BP’s. But wait, there’s more: “We’re going to learn from this accident... We’re gonna change many things in BP... The industry is going to learn a lot for it.” And a passerby after hearing the news: “BP wasn’t always a horrible company.” Did I already say wow?

So that it never happens again, right? Might want to check that history.

Raccoons to run amok with your electronics.

You know me. Flames and raccoons will always win out here. As preposterous as the scenarios are in this United moving spot, I still prefer them to this lofty, self-absorbed approach.

I’m sad for the bad dad in this ad.

Maybe even mad. Because I didn’t think of maybe the greatest twist in political campaign ads since nuclear war and sheep: attacking your own family. Genius! For more disinformation, check out the website.

(Image.)

“My name is Romeo, and I approve this tragedy.”

In response to a question about political ads in Sweden, Åsk over on Brandflakes posted a few memorable ones from the past. Romeo and Juliet? Bravo!

Nevada prisons: “Come for the hot stones—stay for the Tom Cruise.”

They’re just making it too easy now. I can’t keep up.

Make the logo smaller.

Who knew: Smaller logos on fancy brands is classy! Big ones on cheaper? Not so much. So says a new study in the July issue in the Journal of Marketing. Well, in the Journal of the Real World, it’s been that way for a long time. While new money can sometimes be accused of living large and obnoxious, exclusive is about preventing access by a larger audience. Deep, huh.

Red tape 2.0

I don’t mean to bug ya’, but one of the things we talked about on the Beancast this week had to do with the effectiveness of celebrity campaigns on relief efforts. I mentioned a story about Sean Penn in Haiti and his relief efforts he founded with jphro.org, and how he seemed to be flying under the radar. CNN coverage is not under the radar of course, but with disasters, people tend to forget about them soon after the initial outcry. Then it’s apathy 2.0 until the next one happens.

With Penn, you might think great, another celebrity paying lip service, but he’s been living there soon after the earthquake hit and put up his own money to fund efforts. Say what you will but that’s more than I did, by far. He talks about something though facing a lot of NGOs in disaster areas that I heard in an old All Things Considered, in that there’s almost always a lack of central control that hampers efforts.*

That’s an earthquake though, and hard to predict in the way we can forecast a few days out as we do with a hurricane. Except there’s one key difference with relief efforts for oil spills or other man-made disasters: While we focus on the effects of the event after it happens, relief telethons and celebrity videos don’t address the root cause leading up to the event.

(Granted, it might be a stretch to say red tape plays a part in causing man-made disasters, but as the Gulf story has shown, it certainly plays a part in the clean-up effort.)

However, if I had to make that connection, the red tape here could be considered the issues of safety procedures, rushed deadlines and improperly operating equipment which seemed to have all played their part. If you wanna help clean up pelicans, fine. Just remember that there was a human toll: 11 rig workers and one fisherman in the subsequent clean-up.

More importantly, look at all ongoing drilling now and immediately recheck safety procedures. (BP is no friend of OSHA, and their sister rig Deepwater Nautilus is like your neighbor’s dog with a history of breaking free. They also want to start a new one off Libya.)

And we’re focused on t-shirts.

Too often you hear the phrase “so it never happens again” tacked on at the end of a story about a tragic event or disaster, but it’s government agencies and the companies themselves that can have the biggest impact on that statement—ahead of time.

*I can’t find the story now, but the point of the piece was that NGOs come in, do what they can, but then due to things beyond their control, get pulled out, leaving behind a critical shortage of doctors to help people.

Wait, it’s momma grizzlies now?

I’m so confused. Pit bulls. Hockey Moms. Grizzly Moms. Remember America, only you can take back the country from Washington’s communist/socialist/fascist leadership and put it back where it belongs: with scared white American grandmothers and their equally scared daughters.

But wait, there’s more...

– Get a job. Not so fast.
– What cloning really looks like.
– “Generates random moments of multimedia inspiration.”
– Fruit Loops wins again.
– Wanna think like a Mouse?
– Maybe they can float giant burgers for when the next Pope is chosen.
– The first rule of Jane Austen Fight Club...
– iWouldn’t.
– Steve Jobs spreading his demon seed this fall.
– TV is real (life). We believe.
– I’m sure it will be unbiased.

Submitting stuff here? Help me, help YOU.

Not to be a dick, okay, maybe a little, but as much as I appreciate submissions, I threw together a page for anyone wanting to send stuff because the majority of y’all are wasting my/your time lately. I get a lot of things sent that don’t make it for a lot of reasons. Things like links to websites for TV spots and no way to embed them. Or mobile app stories. (Yawn.) Check out the rules of engagement, and help me, help YOU.

Boobies And Kittens.

Play the show now. (Episode NSFW.)

George Parker, Åsk Wäppling, David Burn and mahself have a go at Facebook, Dr Pepper Moms, Old Spice dads and a F**ked Gulf. (More like a headbutt than simply a go.) Yes, this is actually a Beancast without an F-bomb filter in place. IT’S THE SHOW THE GOVERNMENT DOESN’T WANT YOU TO HEAR. (As for the title, inside joke people.) Anyway, at one point, David mentions on the show something he said on AdPulp just how Facebook just *is* the internet for a gen who grew up with it. (Russell Davies amplifies this thought too.)

As for my take, there’s a recent All Things Considered interview with Mark Zuckerberg, and it it, he outlines why Facebook helps organize your life better than anyone else (among other things). The function and utility though that he thinks they offer “better than anyone” needs an overhaul, least from my perspective. It’s clunky and unintuitive, and Google Me, or whatever you’re going to be called, take note.

The topics are here. Me or Bob on Twitter: TheBeanCast, mtlb.

Tags: The Beancast

Ohio, you may have lost a ‘King’ but you just gained a Queen.

Awww, people of Ohio, that’s just good copy, because when life gives you LeBron, you make LeAngela. “I wanna thank the drunk guy at table 24 for telling me I couldn’t do it because it only inspired me to work harder.” No, thank YOU Ms. Davis for taking home top honors as Miss Hooters International 2010. (C’mon, was it really that hard to beat the Middle Eastern contingent?) Note in the career highlights section how she also loves her fuzzy bunny socks. (Not exactly a ringing endorsement for MENSA.) Stop by though and say “Hey!” on Facebook. Her socks will thank you.

Mel writes like...

William Gibson? Who knew F-bombs could be so forward-thinking! Taking a few of Mel Gibson’s more colorful passages and plugging them into I Write Like yields interesting results. (Did I say a few?) Behold the quote that begat William:

“You f*cking offend me. And you don’t care about anyone but yourself, and your f*cking stupid f*cking failed career. And it's ruined us. Because you f*cking can't, f*cking, you wanted that dress? I can’t believe you asked for that. And the tickets, in the Lakers box? I got rid of the box, now nobody gets tickets because of you. I had to sell the motherf*cker!”

A different one yields an ironic choice in feminist author Margaret Atwood:

“Yes you f*cking do, you go out in public and it's a f*cking embarrassment to me. You look like a f*cking bitch in heat, and if you get raped by a pack of ******* it’ll be your fault. All right? Because you provoked it. You are provocatively dressed all the time, with your fake boobs, you feel you have to show off in tight outfits and tight pants you can see your p**** from behind. And that green thing today was enough. That’s provocative. OK? I’m telling you. I’m just telling you the truth! I don’t like it. I don’t want that woman. I don’t want you! I don’t believe you anymore. I don’t trust you, I don’t love you. I don’t want you. OK?”

Sadly, I was unsuccessful in my cut and paste attempts to summon Brecht. Should you feel like playing around, here’s a complete transcript of all his rants.

(Image.)

Forget your wallet, what’s in your burger.

Mmmm. This one might make you think twice about grabbing food at the game. No, beer is not a suitble enough disinfectant, regardless of what you learned in college. ESPN takes a look at food service in professional sports and it’s not pretty boys and girls. Mold in soda machines. Roaches on soda dispensers. The worst: Florida. The Best: California. So does this mean even bottled water isn’t safe?

Sad Men.

(Promo whore that I am, this is a duplicate post of one I ran on Brandflakes For Breakfast.)

Okay Mad Men freaks, before the new episodes hit, dig a little deeper into their history. NPR’s This American Life reran an interview over the weekend with one of The Men™ responsible for some of the greatest lines in advertising history, Julian Koenig (above, left). You can stream it here, starting around 8:45 in. The reporter (his daughter), explores the rift between him and partner George Lois. At first listen, it’s like two old guys fighting, which is always cute, except, their core argument still goes on in agencies across the country today:

Who came up with the idea?

You see it with the CD who *manages* to get his or her name on all the agency’s work—that they never touched. The junior designer who walked by a couch where the brainstorm session for a popular campaign happened, and so naturally that campaign ends up in their book with them as art director on it. You see it with, well, insert an agency role and chances are someone is taking credit for it. In that context, two cranky guys fighting have a point. Awards may be the currency creatives use to judge other creatives by, but ideas are still all that a creative has, as is the credit for same.

To be able to say “yeah, I did that,” matters.

Darryl talks about this in his recap with Bob Knorpp this week, in that one aspect of the tour is how it promotes other agencies. Given the paranoid nature over the credit for ideas, you’d be right to ask who the hell does that? But as Darryl notes, not everyone is protective the way they used to be. (When we started off, that was always one part of it: 1) Visit current clients, 2) Brands we wanted to work for, 3) Agencies we dug and 4) Cool places along the way.) He’s not saying we should be open about everything either. After all, a brand’s trade secrets are still sacrosanct.

But the walls large agencies put up because they fear collaboration as some evil monster are starting to come down. For some they’re not. There’s a big fear out there by many shops that if clients actually knew they couldn’t handle certain things, they’d lose the business. And while digital and social shops are increasingly being called in as *partners* of more traditional shops, you still have turf wars over who gets credit for coming up with the final idea.

Maybe the answer is to simply put the agency’s name on every line of credit in award shows or PR releases. Don’t worry credit whores—you can still tell people you came up with the idea when you show your book. Even if you did.

(Image: Ric Kallaher.)

HerWay.com—Because women *never* stalk guys.

Guys, finally, a dating site for your lazy ass. No more searching through hundreds of profiles for hours. Sign up, and let her chase YOU. Hey, the Most Interesting Dating Advise Guy in the World can’t be wrong. Women can pick and choose the man of their dreams, then make the first move. Why, it’s like The Bachelor in reverse, no? (Wait, that’s where a ton of women fight over one guy, right? Okay, so maybe not.) So maybe not every women on a dating site is stable then?

Argentine hoops—it grows on you.

Argentine Men’s National basketball team meets wtf? Nike knock-off Li-Ning may have copied The Swoosh, but not really sure what they were inspired by in this spot.

(Via.)

“Oh yeah.”

“So what do you think about voicing the concerns of the opposition with really contrived scenarios?” I like it! Only thing missing at the end was the synchronized fist bump. Linda McMahon is back, shaking things up and trying to be the different change Washington needs. SHE CORRALS WRESTLERS—SHE CAN CORRAL RUNAWAY SPENDING IN WASHINGTON! Right? (Of course, with an enviable workplace safety record any employer would be proud of too.) Wait, wasn’t Obama supposed to be the different change we needed? You mean more than one person is using that same positioning? Oh. *shock, awe* Uh-oh, looks like distorted military service records trump wrestler corralling. For now.

“Visit Pensacola and watch BP workers hard at... play?”

I’m all for parody, but ouch Pensacola. Not sure the F-U to BP works. Whether they’re making light of how clean their beaches are or BP’s cleanup effort, seems like the workers in real life that this spot takes a shot at are only locals hired by BP. Why go after them.

What’s that song again?

MysteryGuitarMan is a YouTube *personality* who makes music videos by simply exploring and playing round with YouTube’s format. Typically, his videos display a multi-shot/mega-edit/quick cut style of production that a few people use. One of his recent vids though is a twist on the Hollywood trailer staple: Carl Orff’s Carmina Burana, (Fortuna Imperatrix Mundi: O Fortuna). Play his version from now on for those moments in your life when you need to add some drama, won’t you? Granted, a lot of his pieces see his personality and dialog trying too hard at times to win you over. Still, you can’t help but admire the effort. Through sheer force of playing—literally and figuratively—he’s created a unique style that people have noticed. Since 2006, his YouTube channel has 1.1 million subscribers, over 107 million uploaded views and 13 million channel views. Comments for each video typically hit five figures. Not bad for a few simple songs.

But wait, there’s more...

– Be a pro.
– Die, hobbyist die. (Via.)
– Apple Appographic.
– Beck’s communication director.
– Google Earth discovers impact crater.
– Do you like it?
– Douchebagographic.
– The area between Mexico and AZ/CA/NM/TX is hiring.
– But it’s a really good beer.

F*CK PROFITS BEFORE PELICANS.

“I’m Tweeting the fuck out of this!” Enjoy some good-old fashioned ventalicious anger while helping Gulf relief efforts. Created by Nate Guidas and Luke Montgomery, they drop F-bombs—you drop $13 on a sexy tee at Unf--thegulf.com. Almost 405 from each shirt ($5) goes to the Gulf, and you also get to vote on which charity gets the money. (There’s also angry buttons.) Twitter? Facebook? Check! Keep the pressure on kids, because the greatest enemy of any movement is apathy. Sorry, *fucking* apathy.

(Via.)

What the...?

Tron Girl.

Sidewalkcore.

1950s Education on “Homosexuals.”

Mr. Q Cumber soda.

“Presidential” packaging.

Snare Drum lamp.

Bill Murray earthquake video.

Chocolate Pentagons. (Via.)

(Image.)

Welcome to Spy-Mart

So Wal-Mart is planning to put RFID (radio frequency ID) tags on all its items in their stores. The tags will also be going home with you. I get how the tags can help inventory control in stores, or how the ability to track things on shelves and monitor the browsing habits of people in the store is the next evolution in marketing. Where Google *owns* the space up to and including the storefront, the next front in battle over consumer dollars will take place past that Street View, and head right inside the store using just this kind of tech. But the idea of tracking freaks people out, and I think there’s going to be a backlash over this—or general apathy. I would hope the former because you saw it in the uproar from states over Bush’s REAL ID Act, (the law that all states have chosen to fight because it required RFID tech in a national ID card). In that case, personal data would have been made available to anyone, and in this case, it’s just the item number. Still, the solution here for Wal-Mart seems simply to be to just have cashiers remove the tags before the item leaves the store, and thus negate the concern. Tracking? Check. Customers leave without sense of Big Brother following them home? Check.

Just survive it.

Damn, this Nike Woman spot by Edouard Salier is intense.

Overheard internet...

Yep, they said it...


“Unfortunately, this is not my America and I live here. Violence against the government is the wrong non-solution, as violence begets violence and chaos. If the conservatives were to restructure the government, what would happen to the other legal citizens in this country that are not middle-aged, white, Christian, and uneducated? This is not a movement of the real America, rather, it's a movement of a portion of America facing extinction.”
– kagenotori

“she is terrible looking but that’s really cool that he’s not shallow. Also part of the reason people work so hard to get rid of racism and discrimination is so you can marry and be with whoever you want regardless of color ”
– stephanie


“‘Android is suddenly looking tempting,’ Gruber wrote, referring to the competing smartphone platform from Google. — If you’re considering a change in platform because you couldn’t buy the device within an hour of it being released - your prospective smartphone is way fucking smarter than you are.”
– boxerdude1


“Steve Ballmer’s (dis)organization skills are precisely the reason that Microsoft more closely resembles IBM and Sony than its key competitors like Google and Apple. Instead of a unified vision, the company has become a scattershot of competing departments carrying on through the dying momentum of past successes.”

– Cribbage Left

“WsTF with the implied violence? Spray me with your best shot! Why don’ you spray me with your best shot! Spray me with your best shot! Fire away! (apologies to Pat Benatar)”
– mama no like s


“Looks like rape to me. The girl is just left there on the ground as the guy walks away. This isn't sexy, its sexist, and the reason so many women out there hate our advertising asses.”
– Daiver

Look at your sales—now look at mine.

Am I going to keep beating that play on words into the ground? Yep. Now, there’s been heated discussion—heated I say—over whether Old Spice’s Mega Case Study in Social Media Awesome actually sold anything. The only thing I thought would answer that would be comments directly from the brand. So here you go: Yes. Mike Norton, director of external relations for male grooming at P&G says since starting Isaiah Mustafa’s YouTube response effort on July 13, they saw a 107% increase in Old Spice Body Wash sales over the last month, (according to Nielsen data).

(Via.)

McNabb your tickets now!

Sorry, it’s football—PUNS ARE ALLOWED. Funniest line at the end here from the new Washington Redskins campaign though? “We want Dallas.” Not really sure Dallas is the team to worry about this year, and Philly, man, losing two name QBs in the off-season will be in, as they say, *rebuilding* mode. The Giants though might be a problem. They have a new stadium that they have to share it with their little brother, so they’re gonna be pissed. But I like the use of the “R” logo though.

Only you can prevent beatings in other countries.

“The International Violence Against Women Act (HR 4594/S 2982) was introduced on February 4. This groundbreaking legislation would, for the first time, make stopping violence against women and girls a priority in American diplomacy and foreign aid.”

Catchy ad. Do we really legislation though to tell other countries don’t set women on fire? Guess we do. So much for relying on governments to do the humanitarian thing on their own. To sell this one more however, wish there were a few more sponsors and partners from *other countries* besides John Kerry and Amnesty International.

Play NCAA Football 11 like a champion today.

EA Sports is out with NCAA Football 11 and a straight-forward approach: playing up on the rivalries built into all sports with “Where I come from.” Clips in this one and Big 12 combine actual game scenarios cut in with live action fans and athletes make it a question now of where does the video game end and the sports fan begin. I’m not a fan of the technique so much as I haven’t seen enough that make me go holy shit. Sony PS3 with Kevin Butler is doing some things. Then going further outside the category, I still like the way Ratchet and Clank 2 blended game with live action.

(Agency: Heat)

“As you ride along in glorious comfort.”

Oh, apparently they didn’t film this spot on the NYC > Washington corridor. Let me explain something about Amtrak’s Acela experience as portrayed above, almost the carefree way airplane travel in the ’50s was shown and that Jetpacks hoped it would be by now. Remember in Armageddon when Ben Affleck was trying to make it back to the shuttle before everything exploded around him, but couldn’t keep his balance, and everything around him was shaking apart? Yeah, well, welcome to the *better be sitting or you’re outta luck* glorious experience of the Acela. Just try and leave your seat. You’re pulling 9Gs like fucking Maverick as you make your way to the beverage car—uphill. There’s no shiatsu. No Harlequinesque models dreaming of lands far away. And if you DO happen to make it back in one piece without spilling anything? You’ll find one of the many SRO road warriors and their five carry-ons about to grab your seat. Yeah, welcome to the future of elegant travel. Tickets, please.

Fighting for YOU.

Oh the stuff I get sent. Like an eclipse though, I shield you, my loyal readers from it all. That goes for political campaigns, even though the topic gets covered here a lot. I’m not sure who’s list I got on at one point, but now it’s just one bigass red, white & blue donation orgy going on almost daily in my inbox. This one site though had something about it that’s unlike most, almost disarming in way that the usual political onslaught avoids.

Maybe it’s the lack of the hard sell. Maybe it’s also the first site I’ve seen without a flood of red, white and blue. Either way, Colorado State Senate candidate Lucía Guzmán is a Tea Party keyword conundrum: An openly gay reverend born to Mexican farmworkers who talks about aging as one of her key issues.

Who does that these days and expects to win, like, ever? She’s seriously the first person I’ve seen NOT talk about how she’ll fight for YOU, or how she’ll change the political machine if elected. (Maybe she has and I just can’t see it from my front porch here.) After all, all we have now in these seemingly compressed election cycles is either a candidate’s attack ad or their website to go by. She’ll have my vote come this August’s primary though. Well, I mean, if I lived there she would.

Colorado, don’t forget to get out and vote early–and often.

(Agency: Relish Studio.)