advertising and other stuff. no, really.

Friday, May 4, 2007

Urlacher + badminton = pain.

Bunch of pain-themed spots out in the enhanced water category for Glacéau vitaminwater. Hoo-boy. Bottled and enhanced water: one of the best scams put over on consumers. There was an old Mad magazine back cover where a guy comes out to pick up his morning paper, bottle of milk, water and air. I remember thinking, no freaking way people will buy water. So much for that idea. Anyway, the spots are pretty cool and done by Berlin Cameron United, including this one with Brian Urlacher and David Ortiz. Perfect satire of a completely unnecessary sport, unless of course it’s at a picnic.



Anonymous said...

who are the jokers Brian Urlacher and David Ortiz?? badminton an unnecessary sport? USA dominated badminton once before but you americans gotten fat, lazy, pathetic and useless in badminton. That's why now you see badminton as unnecessary sport. Watch the trend, badminton is growing in popularity. I can't say that for baseball and football. The latters put me to sleep.

Anonymous said...

football, baseball and bowling are the main causes of the dumbing of america. You can bank on that.

Anonymous said...

the stupid vitamin water is perfect for the stupid buyers.

Anonymous said...

Badminton, 2nd only to soccer (football) in popularity on the planet, is unnecessary? Most of the rest of the world thinks that our games of baseball & American football are totally superfluous

Greg said...

It appears that Ortiz no longer shares your disdain for badminton. The following is a quote from an MLB article on Ortiz:

... part of the commercial involved playing some badminton. Let's just say that Ortiz isn't going to be trading in his big bat for a racket any time soon.

"Well, you know the thing is, when they hit it to you, it comes like 150 mph, for real," said Ortiz. "So they were telling me, 'OK, here it comes,' and they hit it and I still didn't get it."

Anonymous said...

Math 101:
Bach + Badminton = Urlacher + Pain

Anonymous said...

Can you say "naivete"? It appears that this blooger, like many in this country, is truly ignorant of the difference between competitive badminton & the backyard variety.

Greg said...

Consider intensity (calories burned per hour, among other factors). Competitve badminton is easily 3 to 4x as intense as tennis. Baseball (& football to a lesser extent) fails miserably when it comes to this type of intensity -- how many MINUTES of athleticism is displayed by fielders & batters in each hour of play? One might even say that baseball is for ppl with athletic talent who are too lazy to play a real sport -- one where they get an actual workout.

Anonymous said...

Jai Alai is often promoted as the "fastest sport on earth" with ball speeds up to 185mph. However, such speeds are often seen in badminton. Quite a few smashes have been clocked in excess of 200mph -- up to 206 recorded in international match play.

Anonymous said...

Badminton also claims the greatest dynamic range in any sports -- the slowest moving object on soft touch shots to the fastest projectile on powerful smashes.

Anonymous said...

"Can you say "naivete"? It appears that this blooger, like many in this country, is truly ignorant of the difference between competitive badminton & the backyard variety."

Can you say apathy?

I know full well what competitive badminton looks like. And ping pong. And curling. And cricket. And blah, blah, blah. All popular sports in their respective countries. And like most Americans, I don't care.

That's a win-win. You get to love your sport. I get to not care about it.

See? Apathy. Not naivete.

Anonymous said...

Dumbing of America -The Proof:

I walked into a Blimpie's with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a sandwich. I handed it to the girl

and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free".

"They're already buy-one-get-one-free", she said, "so I guess they're both free." She handed me

my free sandwiches and I walked out the door.
One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when one of them shouted, "Look at that

dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said, "Where?"


While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because,

he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for some time, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff."

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific."


My colleague and I were eating lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but didn't think she'd get sunburned "because the car was moving."


My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped.

She keeps it in the trunk.


My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.


I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?"

I explained that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned.

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?"


While at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding.
"Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."

Greg said...

APATHY is such a sad, sad thing. 'tis so much worse than ignorance.

Your original blog did NOT express apathy, it expressed DISDAIN for a sport that you didn't happen to master -- you would not have made that comment is you had made any effort to develop some real badminton skills.

Perhaps you decided that it was too much effort. With baseball, you get a whole lot of DRAMA w/o really having to sweat much.

Anonymous said...

You assume too much George. Disdain requires more effort than apathy. Now, a person can be apathetic for any number of reasons, either on purpose, or by default. I just don't care for the sport. So, apathy it is.