No, they did. Then they started offering more stuff on their menu, because, well, that’s what they figured people wanted. Forget the core customers who only come in for a coffee—hell, we already got them hooked—we need to go after the other crowd. The health-conscious crowd who’ll fall for the lower calorie count message. (We just won’t mention the fat and sodium.)Sure, we’ll add so much to the breakfast menu that it’ll piss off regulars who’ll now have to wait longer to get served, but so what—we already have them hooked. Coolatas in the summer? Yep. If Starbucks can do it, so can we. Oh, and the same eight flavors of Munchkins we’ve had forever? Eh, fuck it. Why add new ones. I mean, just because M&M’s added new colors, why should we, right?
Besides, adding new flavors would take too long, right? Wait, what, they already have what they need in place? Like, how Taco Bell basically re-purposes the same five ingredients of lettuce, tomato, beef, cheese and tortilla and comes up with a new concoction each month? Hmmm. Maybe we kin’ look into that.
Right after breakfast.
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