“You’ve been searched by the rest—now try the best.”

“If we don’t get you through security in under 30 minutes, 10% off your next flight.”

The TSA has apparently taken to invading Washington, DC area homes to look for new candidates by using pizza boxes. (Maybe use an x-ray of a pizza in the artwork instead.) Job candidates are encouraged to visit their site or call 1 (877) 872-7990 for more info. People are also reminded that unlike pizza delivery, the TSA doesn’t allow its workers to accept tips.