Weekend movie fun.

“But if you hate the movies so much, why do you go?” Good question. With teens still in the house, they just don’t understand how ‘The Man’ is lining his pockets with warmed-over material ripped from today’s headlines and yesterday’s comic books. Lined even more when it hits the Netflix cue next month.

Nor do they want to hear about how we shouldn’t buy anything to eat or drink when it costs more per gallon than gas does, and who really needs a drink large enough for a handtruck, and why are the floors sticky, and...

Nope. They just wanna go see shit blow up.

Which is what you see in Iron Man. (Not bad with Jeff Bridges as a villain—finally—and a post-rehab Robert Downey Jr. as action hero.) That brief review aside, I’ll just ruminate instead on some of the marketing brilliance on display for this and upcoming films in general that I encountered.

You mean like trailers?

Why yes, yes I do. If you don’t know by now, strategic marketing partner relationships that benefit both franchise brands synergistically product placement is insane. Close-ups of logos on t-shirts, happy meals with scratch and win stickers along with cars by GM and Ford everywhere you look, all headed your way.

And the pre-preview is now basically Access Hollywood promos for new films and shows on cable. Good to also see that repurposing your TV spots as trailers is alive and well. (I also miss the movie trivia they used to run: who knew the shark in Jaws was fake!)

Then there’s a brief lesson on civil obedience: Martin Scorsese’s PSA above is the latest attempt to get people to act polite in the theatre. Nice try Marty. (Hey, look! Same lady from the “I do not recall that” parental control spot.)
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Okay, digression over. I mean, the spots are funny and all, but really, they won’t work because people do whatever they want—rules being for others and all. Besides, isn’t the guy next to you checking HIS TEXT MESSAGES IN THE DARK MORE ANNOYING?? Why yes, yes it is.

Oh yeah, btw, on TV!)nobody is renting the theatre for their next corporate meeting, so just 86 that slide right now from the deck.

Best cool/sad moment:

Sad: They ran a still of the new Will Ferrell/John Reilly trainwreck Step Brothers. (Someone email Will and tell him he doesn’t need to do a new buddy movie for each kid Madonna adopts.)

Cool: It wasn’t a still though as they started moving around in the space surrounding the type. See, trailer technology is evolving. (*A little snark if ya couldn’t tell, but, I actually liked the effect*)



Comic books are the new...

The other thing that seems to be getting huge is the dominance of comic book franchises as movie properties. Iron Man director Jon Favreau was right about these stories—doesn’t matter what actor you plug in, the suit is the hero.

Trailers for more of the same in sequel land: The Hulk with Ed Norton and Tim Roth. While these are two great actors who make anything watchable, where there that many burning questions left unanswered that we need a sequel so soon? Oh, I forgot, that blowing shit up thing again, sorry, what was I thinking.

Will Smith is the reluctant hero Hancock. Then there’s Dark Knight, which does look very cool. (Heath may just make you forget Jack? Could happen.)

Indy, look out!

Speaking of cups and logos, grabbed this cup from BK with the new Indiana Jones movie promo and thought, damn, I know color can be tricky when printing this stuff, but Indy may have problems lifting that whip if that’s how old he looks. (Click image to enlarge.)

Then I saw this pic and went damn, maybe not—someone’s been hitting the weights. And then as if to say I’m more man than anyone in the audience, he waxes his chest in yet another PSA, this time for conservation.org. (It was then I suddenly felt like Richard Dreyfuss crushing a styrofoam cup to Robert Shaw’s hands of iron death.)

Vowing not to be humiliated like this ever again, I returned home, eager to show that bitch who he’s dealing with. Tomorrow, I plan on doing five blog posts, not four—in one day.

Five Harrison. Five.