If there’s the word ‘bear’ in your name, I expect to see one.

One of the stops on tour had us at the Black Bear Diner in Medford, OR. Bears on everything. Wood carving door posts. Coffee cups. Menus. Ashtrays. Curtains. Condoms. Name it. Even the portions were enough for a bear. Although the one thing missing that I’d expect to see after flying across country, then driving one thousand miles is, well, an actual bear. Instead, it’s ironic that I had to come back home to NJ for that, where the first thing people think of isn’t bears on curtains, but The Sopranos and how ‘safe’ Trenton/Newark is. To the locals here in the Northwest part of the state though, brand black bear is alive and well. Like tonight when one walked in front of our house. Caution: Bear in video is a lot bigger than it appears—all 300+ lbs of it. Apologies in advance for the Bigfoot sighting Flip camera shakiness, but when a curtain comes to life, there’s no time for a tripod.

That damn sign.

Know how many people get their picture taken in front of the Welcome To Las Vegas sign? Neither do I but it’s lots. Some drunk, some not. At least based on my unscientific study of the time I spent shooting it ‘round midnight.

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Because Vegas is for families.

Here’s something you never see on the ground here. Perfect for the little kid who picked it up and gave it to his dad. Thanks kid. Maybe dad can sneak out later, after the family goes to sleep.

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Remember: Keep your signs to seven words or less.

Now there’s a guy with a call to action. Snapped quickly as we walked by with an iPhone was one of the people in the ‘old’ Vegas casino area responsible for saving Vegas and mankind, possibly in that order. The sign in his right hand has a list of everyone Jesus hates. The usual suspects: Homosexuals, Muslims, bloggers, etc. Say what you will, but the overall messaging is direct. And with two foot letters, he didn’t have to shout a single word. (He also had Jesus schwag like flyers and shirts.) Always be branding people!

Try one today!

Sometimes you forget where you are. Then you see an ad like this all over the taxis and weeklies in Vegas and reality takes hold.

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What you snip in Vegas...

Probably a good idea actually to keep some of the gene pool around here from replicating. As we finished unwrapping the van I spied this outdoor across the way. For Vegas, it’s probably not the strangest sight, but it is the first time I can recall seeing two fake owls on either end of an outdoor. To scare away what, I don’t know.

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It may just be hot here.

Hey, I know, on the way to Vegas, let’s stop and shoot pics like they do for CD covers in the desert. You know, the ones where everyone is standing far apart? Cool. EXCEPT WHEN IT’S 108°.

A far cry from Oceanside beach five hours earlier.

Lee Harvey, it’s the stories you tell.

Sometimes a dollar is only .98¢. Maybe you need to you use the restroom and there are extraordinary security measures in place. Or you see someone you know of in a celebrity cemetary, even read a great line from another. Then Jim comes by and starts telling you about every person buried there and the doc he’s working on about it. Things like which one had to be moved because their estate couldn’t afford the upkeep. Even where Mr. Breakfast Club is buried, but before you can see that, and, just as you start the 11:40 show, Protector of the Dead™ shows up and kicks you and your kind out. Twice. So you decide to get some lunch. Tasty! And after a few more hours driving, you just want to settle into your motel. Not, hear stories about the silver Honda with foil blankets crammed inside and pictures taped to its exterior. Pictures and names of known drug dealers in the area that the owner is trying to protect people from, but who also has had most of the pictures they taped in place ripped from the car. The guard standing at the front entrance strapped with a nine gives the owner 12 hours—if that.

Welcome to Carlsbad.

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Just another day in LA.

Seeing this just before seeing Danny Bonaduce.

He smirked at the van.

He did not attack.

We took this to mean all hope is not gone.

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Leave your desk.

(The following is a repost from the one I did over on the Plaid Nation blog.)

Trying to catch up on the 50,000 blog posts and came across a great find from David at Ad Pulp on problems the traditional vs. interactive media crowds have. Regardless of what people call themselves now, and whether you’re an interactive freak or TV dude, something this tour reinforces applies to both worlds: Leave your desk.

Get out and see places. Flyover country. The smaller markets. Places where you’re a minority for a change. The people on brands who don’t have TV money to spend, let alone do a ‘cool’ Flash site. See what customer service is like in other states or how small companies compete for business using untraditional methods. See a car in a Super 8 with a cam, a helmet and a log in the rear window. All of it. How can you be better at what you do if you don’t fully understand things you try and convince your clients to do?

Leave your desk—and go sit in a van. You will not have a better time, I promise.

It’s 3:42–do you know where your blogger is?

Why, rolling in from a day in Silicon Valley trying to catch up on posting duties, but distracted by ... THE MADONNA INN. No, Sean and her didn’t stay here.) But, if they did, they would’ve stayed in the Caveman room, one of over 1,000 different themed rooms. So look at that, then look at pictures of us at Seesmic, after trashing Robert Scoble’s front lawn as we did the 11:40 show followed by hooking up with other Twitter freaks. You can also read a recap over on the Plaid Nation blog where I’m also posting.

Tags: brands, viral

San Francisco welcomes Bernadette Peters—and Plaid

She’ll be appearing at the bookstore next to where we had coffee today. But remember people, for your own safety, she will not be signing memorabilia. Make a note. More pics from the day’s events here.

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Free wireless and free rust. Bonus!

Mmmmm. Who wants tea water? When you’re on the road, always remember to run the tap for a little bit.

Tags: Travel Lodge

Double entendre tagline week.

Now there’s a brand promise. From Portland, Voodoo Doughnut. Imagine if Bar of Soap baked. This is what it’d be like.

One man’s wood grain is another man’s...

We felt a certain kindred experience as we passed by this van in Portland. Getting closer, you realize just how amazing it is. Not just for the missing left rear window or gold bumpers. Mostly, it’s the restraint shown by JC when it came to contact info, preferring to go without a phone number anywhere. (Maybe he has too much business already and is tired of calls 24/7?) In this day and age though when certain vans have wireless internet and webcams, keeping things simple like JC is the sign of a true maverick.

You smell something?

Don’t fry this at home. It’s discovering moments like this that make the trip worthwhile. Apparently roman candles and plastic don’t mix. Who knew.

Buddy can you spare a tie.

(Taken from the new batch of tour pics from Seattle.)

His English was good enough, and he was dressed well enough, but the man didn’t know how to tie a tie, and would someone please help him. Darryl proceeds to show him how to tie one. (Not lost was the irony of a guy needing help with something like this and then asking an agency that doesn’t wear ties.)

Call the scene bizarre, call it whatever, you wouldn’t be wrong. But the courage it takes for someone to go into a coffee shop, be ignored by everyone in line, yet still look for a stranger who would help says a lot. No way to know if he got the job, but it was a cool thing to do.

Vancouver photos.

The actual cost of filling the van fell short of my $154 guess, but $120.01 was still a lot. (The pump only went to a $100, then you pump again.) Check out the rest of the thrilling, I say thrilling action in this batch of photos from the first day in Vancouver and Seattle. Maybe this one is a bad omen though? Although, nobody came out to stop us taking the pic. Need an alley straight out of central casting? Speaking of, here’s me trying not to stand straight.) With the tweeker crowd in the park, the mountain range, the space needle thing, and the sushi places on every corner, I can see why the X-Files and other productions shoot in Vancouver. It looks almost identical to DC and NYC.

Tags: Plaid Nation 2008

You strap it to your back and pray.

Shouldn’t I be focusing on marketing stuff when on tour? Ehhh, no. Jetpacks won’t be satisfied with this, but it's kinda close to the whole jet-propelled thing. So when we pull in to the Travel Lodge near Vancouver late last night, there was a guy loading one of these into his van. Soooo we ask, what the hell is that. It’s a paramotor. Hook it up to a chute, strap it to your back, and make your peace. These things always come with a local news story involving gravity and the word ‘ultralight.’

(Image via.)

See, I thought Canadians had a good sense of humor.

That is, until you get to the border gate after waiting in line for an hour. Don’t forget to joke about where you’re staying or mention that you’re going to meet bloggers. Then you have to use a pic from Google to replace the stuff you shot that had any agents’ pics in it. Oops. Who knew! This was after they had us wait inside their newly redecorated detainment facility while they searched the van. As soon as they administered a multiple choice quiz on places we lived,wished to live or never lived, we were free to go. We also had to pledge allegiance to Rush and John Candy.