BECAUSE IT HAS THE CRISPIN GLOVER, IS WHY.

Drunk History—you know it, you love it from Funny or Die. This one via Ectoplasmosis! though has Crispin Glover and John C. Reilly. I like Reilly but Crispin’s the draw. (2:13 ftw.) Like they used to do with Elvis, I’ve left three tickets at the Will Call here for Glover, Gary Busey and Bill Murray. In perpetuity of course.

Bill f*ckin Murray.

Distinct, consistent brand? Or maybe, people just expect you to do the one thing you’re good at. Not that Al Pacino would, but Murray shows up and starts bartending. Al couldn’t; people expect Bill Murray, well, should. Or posing as a Ghostbuster above.

Compare it to Leonard Nimoy, who wrestled with his I Am Not Spock/I Am Spock identity crisis, or Sting, who vowed never to end up singing Roxanne at concerts when he was older—and is now singing... Roxanne at concerts... older.

Bill Murray though has been The Man™ for several decades. Small indie roles. TV cameos. Bike shops. Dish washings. Poetry readings.

The understated I’m The Coolest Everyman You’ll Meet vibe was rarely seen on SNL. Maybe as part of Belushi’s classic cheeseboigey skit, or as an extra, but mostly he was over the top hammy, in effect parodying the future Weekend Update celebrity thing from David Spade and even Dennis Miller’s ultra-hip “babe” schtick.

It fit them.

Usually though, understated kills SNL cast members. Fairly or unfairly, the second they leave the show, the ones who were meh on the show end up wallpaper that nobody really remembers. (Even having memorable characters isn’t always enough for post-show success. Ask Joe Piscopo.) But on the show, SNL also has always been about the breakout character that can be driven into the ground.

I just don’t recall one specific character Murray created the way I can a Mike Meyers or Will Ferrell though.

I couldn’t see him change now any more than I could see Apple changing what it does. Or Coke. Okay, so maybe New Coke was like that one project every actor tries, fails at, then later regrets. (Think Jim Carry trying to be taken seriously.) Murray actually tried this move early on with The Razor’s Edge, but apparently, people weren’t ready for him to be lost in an adaptation of Somerset Maugham.

Which goes to expectations. Or does it.

People forgave the failures as long as you came back with what they wanted all along. But then, Murray hits the understated sweet spot and does his best post-schtick work (Caddyshack, et al.) this past decade.

(By ironic comparison, Chevy Chase never recaptured that same vibe that he nailed in CaddyShack and Fletch, preferring instead to play buffoons—minus the deftness of Jeffrey Tambor in Arrested Development and Larry Sanders.)

Wait, what? They just announced Ghostbusters 3? Oh.

Only Bill fucking Murray could pull that off.

But wait, there’s more...

– Ken Griffey Jr. sleeps in dugout—Starbucks finds new sponsor? (Via.)
– Pedigree opens up the floodgates again.
– When everyone drank from the same cup.
– New dads need burgers too.
– The day his picture ended up in The Onion.
– Frank Frazetta, R.I.P.
– Creepy robot mouth.
– Victoria’s Secret shoot or Trump beauty pageant? Oh, same!
– Mix your own Coke.
– GZA, RZA and Bill Groundhog day, Ghost-bustin’ ass Murray.
– Your porn tax dollars at work.
– Apple approaches 1984 with the Chilling Effect.
– Date fail.
– The Dark Side of London.
– Chatroulette has naked ads. No, they do.
– Suicide Girls meets Dahmer meets HGTV.
– Be the bag.
– LOOK at it. No, seriously, look at it.
– Doctors Mystified By Bandana Fused to Man’s Head.

Bill Murray, Poet. (Reader.)

Poetry reader. More than just an impromptu bartender or longtime Hudson River resident foodie, he is above all else, a poetry reader to construction workers... who are building a poet house.

(Via C-Monster.)

But wait, there’s more...

– Twitter’s ad model in 140 characters.
– Walken, 5-0. (Via.)
– Bill Murray’s pseudo Leary tech rant.
– Welcome to Manville—population: 4500 20mm rounds per minute.
– That’s a fan.
– Yes, there’s a Professional Sports Wives magazine.
– We won’t fix it in post.
– Banner ads are people too.
– Forget Segal’s ponytail, will their helmets fit the ego?
– Nicht mehr Facebook!
– Air Marshal Service-$200 million per arrest?
– The Art of Manliness.
– Mommy, why does Kermit have to work blue?
– Fontopoly.
– Glenn Close’s Genome Sequencing.
– Cigarette classics.
– The guy Johnny gave the finger to.

“There it is! It’s no big deal.”

It gets your attention, and that’s all that matters, right? Any PR is good PR, no? Dog poop problems cut in half since this Torbay Council poster in the UK started appearing in April. It got the results, so why wouldn’t you run this here? WHAT’S YOUR PROBLEM PEOPLE.

Worst case, the kid wasn’t hurt. (She probably got a tummy ache from all the candy bars she ate during the shoot.) But shocking for shocking’s sake sure worked, dinnit? Or maybe it was a flat fine of £75 ($121 dollars) and a potential £1,000 penalty ($1,623 dollars). I still say scary PSAs do shit (ouch) to curb repeat offenders. You need big-ass fines and enforcement. Park in a handicapped spot? $10,000 fine. Try it out for a month and see who parks there.

Here, scaring in-con-SIDERATE asshole owners by using kids might be a fail. Think they care that a kid will find it? When it comes to walking their dog, many people don’t care where it goes, and damn if they’re picking up after it. Besides, what parent watches their kid chow down like Bill Murray in Caddyshack?

Before Spinal Tap, before The Beatles...

There were The Rutles. Going to the vault this week for a little-known homage to the Fab Four by Monty Python's Eric Idle. Really, the first true mocumentary that was just as funny as Spinal Tap would be a few years later, and as good a parody of sixties mania as any Austin Powers’ flick. (Look for cameos by many of SNL’s early stars like Bill Murray and John Belushi as well.)

Okay armchair Spielbergs, YouTube wants your backyard mishaps.

“Hello. My name’s Jason Reitman. HP is sponsoring this contest. If you wi...”
CUT. From the top please.
“Hi, I’m Jason Reitman and I’m here to te...”
CUT. Again please.
“Hey guys, my name’s Jason Reitman. Wanna hang with real filmmakers like me and listen to my dad’s Bill Murray stories?”
CUT.
“FUCK! What was wrong with that one? Okay. Gimmee a sec ... motivation, motivation. Okay. I’m good. Let’s go!”
“Hi. Check out another YouTube contest. Thanks.”
CUT. That’s a Wrap. Nice job Jason.

Previous YouTube prize fun:
1) Hanes.
2) Axe.
3) Novartis.
4) McDonald’s.
5) Tiger Balm.
6) Miss Horrorfest 2007.

Tags: HP, Project:Direct

FCU, Bill Murray and the chopsticks song.

I have no idea what FCU is or who Pete and Brian are, but the chopsticks song alone made it worthwhile. I suppose there are worse ways to lose nine minutes of your life on YouTube.

Tags: Bill Murray, FCU, Pete and Brian

Time Warner is not a monopoly.

Ah. “The spirit of service.” Not quite. I tried getting DSL for the new apartment. Called up Qwest. They had good prices relative to the evil empire that is Time Warner, so lemmee see what’s up. But then, the following conversation:

Me: Like to see about getting DSL.
Q: No problem sir. Address?
Me: [gives info]
Q: Sorry sir. We don’t cover that area.
Me: Whatta ya mean? Your coverage area says you cover that zip code [where apt. is].
Q: Not exactly sir. That’s [Evil Empire] territory.
Me. Yes, but I have them already, and they’re too expensive, that’s why I called you. Your map says you do.
Q: Sorry sir, they’re the only ones who can help you.
Me. [pausing] Nice monopoly.
Q: It’s not a monopoly sir.
Me: [Thinking to self, he didn’t just say that, did he?] When I can only get only one provider of a service in an area? That’s a monopoly.
Q: No sir. Due to an agreement with the individual towns and cable providers, each cable company is only allowed to serve a particular area. That’s not a monopoly sir.
Me: [Not sure I heard what I know I just heard.] Excuse me? You’re telling me TW is the only way I’m getting my DSL. If that’s not a monopoly, I don’t know what is.
Q: [Pause] Anything else sir?
Me: Nope, that’ll do it. You could’ve given me help, but instead, you’ve given me so much more.
(This last line being my favorite Bill Murray retort from Quick Change which I keep forgetting to use, due to the fact that previous conversations like the one above usually leave me in too much of a stupor to remember to do so.)

Tags: Qwest customer service, Time Warner

Animal House tops Bravo’s funniest movie list.

Saw the Bravo show over the weekend and agreed with most of their choices. Interesting that Dr. Strangeglove is the oldest movie on there considering the Three Stooges always seem to be comedy gold for lists like this.

Choices I disagree with:
84) Silver Streak
57) Swingers. On the fence about this one.
21) Shampoo. (you have to be kidding me) Bulworth was funnier, and that movie sucked.

My omitted list, which admittedly, contains some obscure choices:
1) Quick Change with Bill Murray. What About Bob? is not as funny as this movie.
2) White Men Can’t Jump. I love Jack Black but no Way School of Rock is better.
3) 48 Hours. If Silver Streak is on there, this should be too.
4) Bob Roberts with Tim Robbins. Great political mocumentary.
5) Cadillac Man with Robin Williams and Tim Robbins.
5) The Longest Yard. (The original.)

Agree, disagree? Got some of your own?

Tags: Bravo funniest movies

Bill Murry gets EXXXcited.

(It was a pun. I went for it. Sue me.) More fun with keywords and text advertising. This article on Bill Murray incorporates in-text advertising. (Keywords bought by advertisers in stories you read. Standard stuff for news services.) Except for the one special keyword ‘actors’ in the last sentence of the fifth paragraph.
(click image to enlarge.)

So much for monitoring the keyword software. (The link may be fixed by now, but if not: WARNING: just hover over the link. Clicking it will take you to an adult site that’s NSFW.) Speaking of, if things don’t work out for Murray, at least he can always find jobs in another part of the film industry.

Tags: advertising, Bill Murray, Excite, Broken Flowers